We all have an emotional reserve. This is the space between a potentially triggering event and a negative or dramatic reaction. We can all think of those people who essentially have zero reserve. A car turning with no blinker, the wrong order on a patient, or a change in flight status is enough to cause an immediate explosion. We also all know a person who seemingly has an endless reserve. No matter what the circumstance, he/she stays cool and calm. The good news is we are not just sentenced to our own emotional responses. To a large degree, we can become more aware of and learn to adjust our reactions.
The following is a list of ways in which we can increase our emotional reserve. If all done consistently, these can have a dramatic effect on your emotions and your satisfaction. They’re all seemingly simple but can be so hard to do.
1. Sleep. You’ve heard it over and over, but it's true. If you are not getting a consistently good night’s sleep, this will affect all areas of your life. There are times such as residency when lack of sleep is beyond our control. In those cases, really try to maximize the other areas on the list to carefully care for yourself. Try to limit technology before bed.
2. Eat nutritious foods. Try to decrease or moderate chemicals (preservatives, caffeine, and alcohol), and increase vitamins and minerals (plants). Try to shift from quick sugar to longer lasting protein and fiber. A breakfast consisting of a scone and a latte will give you hangry and crashing mid-morning (speaking from direct experience here).
3. Stay hydrated. Find a water bottle you love and keep that puppy filled all the time.
4. Move your body. A dedicated exercise routine is outstanding, but you don’t have to join a gym or buy new equipment to get the benefits. Ten minutes of stretching in the morning, a walk over your lunch break, swimming with your kids, or doing something active with friends in the evening will all give you a huge boost.
5. Get outside. Any time outdoors will remind you that life is much bigger than your current problem. It has a grounding effect. Just stepping outside for a couple minutes can do it. If you really want to have fun with it, do a walking sensory meditation. First take note of everything you are seeing. Try to identify all the different colors of the sunset. Then take note of all the noises you can distinguish – you will be surprised what you pick out. Then all the smells. And finally, the feelings – wind, sun, the pull of your dog on the leash, that annoying bunched up left sock.
6. Decrease the drama. Try to extract yourself from gossip, drama, and negativity. Become aware of what you are reading and watching. If your intake is all negative, you will start to see the world through a much more negative lens and react accordingly.
7. Have something to look forward to. This can be a big thing like a vacation, or a small thing like your favorite sandwich. A gathering with friends, a pedicure, a new class, a good book. Put it on your calendar and really savor looking forward to it.
8. Prepare for the day. Solve for the things that tend to be problems for you. Are you always late (ahem, again speaking from personal experience here), always trying to find your keys, can’t find clean scrubs, not sure if the car has enough gas? Set aside a day each week or a few minutes each night to fully prepare for your week. Perhaps on Sunday you fill the car with gas, make a meal plan for the week, and do laundry. Or each night you make sure your work bag is ready, major emails have been tended to, and you have clothes, money, and food for the next day. Solve in advance for your consistent problem spots.
9. Pause. When a triggering circumstance arises for you, simply pause. Start to develop awareness around the situation. Refer to my post on the categories of human experience. Recognize the neutral facts of the circumstance. Patient’s chart does not have complete lab data. Then recognize the thought you are having about that circumstance. “Seriously?? Again? I know Marsha didn’t order these correctly again! WHERE IS SHE?!” Then recognize the emotion your thought is causing. Frustration. If you act from this place, your actions will look different than if you pause, get all the data, and redirect yourself. Pausing and developing awareness will have dramatic effects for your own mental wellness as well as your interactions.
10. Increase your social connections. Close social connections are one of the most important factors in overall wellness, happiness, longevity, and satisfaction with life.
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